Get a Difficult Conversation Back On Track

Frequently our conversations can into difficult conversations, frustrating, resentment and time and effort wasting.

There are many conversational tools we can become skilful at.  Let’s look at our top 5:

TIP ONE:  Shift to understanding and learning

In conversation, it can be challenging not to try to convince the other person to adopt our point of view.  We ALWAYS have to see things from anothers perspetive in order to communicate well.  If we see a conversation about understanding and learning aboanotherthers person, we can make space to take in their viewpoint.  Each person will feel like the conversation is mutually an investment in time/ a partnership and not an opposition.

TIP TWO: No Assuming

When our opinion or our ego feels threatened, we like to guess what we believe the other to be thinking.  The assumptions we make reveal a lot about what WE are thinking rather than the person we are communicating with.  Assuming really does prevent us from really understanding the meaning to the challenge and being able to effectively come up with solutions.  Drop the ego.

TIP THREE:  Work together to problem solve

Not everyone can handle feedback with grace, and when we don’t, we don’t learn from the feedback.  Have you heard of something called Feed Forward?  Rather than tell the other what you hope can be a solution, ask them for suggestions.  Our brain likes to presever and protect our self-image, when there is a perception of working ‘together’, noone feels targetted.

TIP FOUR:  Be Friends with Silence

Sometimes, you may find yourself in a moment of silence in a conversation and all too often we rush to fill in the gap.  Silence can very much be golden, allowing the words to be processed and calmly responded to.

TIP FIVE:  Learn how to Handle Difficult Conversations

There are a myraid of excellent books produced on this topic, conflict is inevitable in the workplace with so many creative people and people wanting to share their ideas.  Be open to reading, learning and observing how others deal with these type of challenges.

Ella Bates – MASTER TRAINER.  I’m a believer in taking massive action to master a topic, dream or goal. 

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